During my walks every day there are so many moments that I am drawn to something that peaks my attention. It might be the Light that plays with the shadows the trees are creating on the path. Or the sound of the ducks and geese, the blackbirds and seagulls, all the birds singing their own tune. It feels like a little tug that will make me alert and aware of my surroundings. Yet in a different way, not to so much the big picture, yet all the small details. The way the earth changes its colors, the dirt getting grey by drought, or just intensified black after a rainy day.
I love to watch these changes, like a great big kaleidoscope, changing by the minute. It keeps me focused and attuned, even in such a manner, I am almost get run over by a bike I didn’t see or heard coming. Yet instinctively I know to step aside, always in the right direction. Yet caught by surprise, because not many people take this path on bike to get to the sport fields that are just on the other side of the trees. I lose track of time, walking in this kind of awareness. Standing in the bright Sun light, absorbing the energy and creating the connection deep within the earth, to the core of Gaia.
To me this is a daily routine, never get bored never feel as a discipline or method. It just happens naturally the minute I am outdoors in nature, with the sounds of traffic in the background. Yet being so focused it filters it out, just to hear only the sounds nature brings to me. Doves flying from tree to tree, blackbirds on the ground searching for food, or the flapping of the wings when the ducks fly up. Yelling at each other it seems at times. All this is an energy that enables me to stay centered within. Not just that. It also enables me to let the thoughts and emotions come up freely, not controlling them in any way. The state of conscious awareness through breathing allows me to shift through the memories that come up.
The happy as well the sad or more painful ones, that comes up will be in connection with what is going on in my day to day life. When they do, I have learned to allow them to come up, and breathe consciously through them when they come from this deep memory well based in all my cells of my body, mind and heart. Spirit is the glue that connects all together. It is also the guideline for me, that enables me to see the bigger picture. To see both sides, or more sides that are at hand in any given time. Sometimes it are memories from childhood, or aspects of all my roles during this lifetime. Being a wife, lover, mother, grandmother, daughter as well for one.
Walking along the path, pondering about certain events that spring to mind, I also feel the presence around me of the unseen world. Through the sudden appearance of a heron, for instance or the splash of water created by a jumping fish. It is in those details I know I am not alone. Yet I have felt alone through out the years. Even though I was always aware of my spiritual guides, this journey is one that brought up many challenges. Physical, emotional and mental as well. Whenever something springs to mind I knew it was time to address the issue in order to release and let go, to love and to heal. The more I was and am able to work through this process of releasing, the more confident I am.
The way I am able to have compassion for others wasn’t that integrated within myself. I have been fighting my way through physical issues, getting angry with the way my body was limiting me, as well grateful for the way it does. In this process over the years there has always been this challenge of allowing what is, accepting the way I have chosen on a soul level. It has brought me clarity, understanding, going through layer upon layer. The way this is connected with the energy of being in nature comes natural for me. Even as a child you could find me in the woods, close to my home, in the early morning hours when everybody was still asleep. I loved the way the day started and everything came to life in the early morning hours.
Walking has always been healing for me, as does spending time in nature, either woods, forests ,lake or seaside. I think to me it was important because it enabled me to keep my balance, being high sensitive to all those noises and people around me. So every time I needed to regroup internally, on all levels, I went into nature. It is also assisting me to clear my head, let go of all the mind triggers, creating stillness and silence within myself. Over time with the acceptation of the way I am wired, came the increasing love as well compassion. As if it was just stepping aside in order to get a different perspective to the way I perceive myself. Compassion is a beautiful gift to give to yourself. It will immediately release you from any kind of shame, anger, sadness you might hold. Especially if you think you fail yourself.
This morning I was hold by the energy of the Sun and this bright shining sparkling Light on the water reflected and reaching out all the way towards me. The warmth I felt, not just from the Sun, filled my entire being with love and held me in a familiar special way. Even writing down this memory and experience, it rises again in my heart, bringing a big smile on my face. My love is a constant and special connection. Reaching out through time and space, through the veil with the unseen. Bringing me comfort when I need it. But most of all, the love that exists in the sacred space within my heart is growing and expanding in our journey together.
The compassion I felt for me, enables me to open up fully towards myself as well. Love is and always will be the key to the Heart, Spirit and Soul, in every moment of the day. You only have to open up, and let it take you by the hand to follow its lead. It will bring you joy and happiness, it allows to let all the fear and doubts go. It will fulfil the wholes in the emotional body as well the physical. It is the key to fall in love with self as well. To fully understand and sense the inner beauty that is there, waiting to come forward the moment you allow it to be. I love to stand tall in the Light of the Sun, the reflection of my inner Sun Light, expressed in my day to day life.
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